Post by Speed Racer on Sept 17, 2008 23:33:15 GMT -5
The Wachovia Center: Under Attack
Associated Press
These tiny little fuckers carry a mean punch.
PHILADELPHIA -- The lone basketball team in the City of Incestual Brotherly Love, the Sixers, may soon be without a home. Team officials say that Wachovia Arena has recently been attacked by a horde of people under 4'11" in what is being dubbed 'Midgetgate'. Apparently, any story is given validity if you toss 'gate' on the end.
Following an exclusive interview on NBC10 in which DeMar DeRozan was quoted as saying, 'I have all midget servants in my house - they can really get in those tough to reach corners,' the 'tiny' population throughout the city has been in an uproar. When asked how they reach the high spots, DeRozan noted that the midgets just form a tower.
The controversial, and what some even consider to be demeaning, comments have struck a tiny little nerve with the leprechaun-like population of this city. DeRozan has received various death threats in the mail (with the assistance of a person tall enough to put the envelope in the mailbox - currently under investigation) after refusing to apologize for his statements.
'Look, I'm black. Who the fuck is supposed to clean my house? I deserve to right the right to make someone clean my balls at this fucking point. Also, fuck the national anthem. I'm black,' said DeRozan to reporters after an Sixers practice.
Extensive damage has been done to the Wachovia Center and the team is believed to be exploring other options, including relocation. New owner Wiz Khalifa recently made a statement to reporters:
'Who's the kid spittin' flames, changin' the game, his name? It's Wiz Khalifa man.'
Rumors are circulating that the Sixers have been in discussion with Pittsburgh officials, the hometown of Owner Khalifa, regarding the relocation of the franchise. Pittsburgh has recently opened a new, state-of-the-art arena that can house an NBA franchise. Talks have been heating up, and given the recent drama in downtown Philly, a move looks very possible at this point. Players have been very receptive to this notion as well.
To date, 3,600 midgets (occupying just six standard jail cells - you can really pack them in there) have been arrested while 14 have been killed. Stay tuned for further details in this developing story.
Associated Press
These tiny little fuckers carry a mean punch.
PHILADELPHIA -- The lone basketball team in the City of Incestual Brotherly Love, the Sixers, may soon be without a home. Team officials say that Wachovia Arena has recently been attacked by a horde of people under 4'11" in what is being dubbed 'Midgetgate'. Apparently, any story is given validity if you toss 'gate' on the end.
Following an exclusive interview on NBC10 in which DeMar DeRozan was quoted as saying, 'I have all midget servants in my house - they can really get in those tough to reach corners,' the 'tiny' population throughout the city has been in an uproar. When asked how they reach the high spots, DeRozan noted that the midgets just form a tower.
The controversial, and what some even consider to be demeaning, comments have struck a tiny little nerve with the leprechaun-like population of this city. DeRozan has received various death threats in the mail (with the assistance of a person tall enough to put the envelope in the mailbox - currently under investigation) after refusing to apologize for his statements.
'Look, I'm black. Who the fuck is supposed to clean my house? I deserve to right the right to make someone clean my balls at this fucking point. Also, fuck the national anthem. I'm black,' said DeRozan to reporters after an Sixers practice.
Extensive damage has been done to the Wachovia Center and the team is believed to be exploring other options, including relocation. New owner Wiz Khalifa recently made a statement to reporters:
'Who's the kid spittin' flames, changin' the game, his name? It's Wiz Khalifa man.'
Rumors are circulating that the Sixers have been in discussion with Pittsburgh officials, the hometown of Owner Khalifa, regarding the relocation of the franchise. Pittsburgh has recently opened a new, state-of-the-art arena that can house an NBA franchise. Talks have been heating up, and given the recent drama in downtown Philly, a move looks very possible at this point. Players have been very receptive to this notion as well.
To date, 3,600 midgets (occupying just six standard jail cells - you can really pack them in there) have been arrested while 14 have been killed. Stay tuned for further details in this developing story.
